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Commiefornia

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Old Oct 7, 2003 | 09:40 PM
  #1  
Gonzo's Avatar
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From: New Braunfels, Texas
Commiefornia

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.

5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower! that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

9. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't even notice.

14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.

15. Your car insurance costs as much as your mortgage payments.

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S&M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.

17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

18. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH 2003."

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Banks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo class.

20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or pagers.

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

23. Both you AND your dog have therapists.
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Old Oct 7, 2003 | 09:45 PM
  #2  
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From: Tomball, Texas
Re:Commiefornia



MikeyB
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Old Oct 7, 2003 | 10:05 PM
  #3  
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From: Prescott Valley, AZ
Re:Commiefornia

lol

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Old Oct 7, 2003 | 10:46 PM
  #4  
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From: San Antonio,TX
Re:Commiefornia

How true Gonzo..can't be better said. you missed a couple..
You might be a commiefornian if:
Your drive to work is only 10 miles,but sit in traffic for an hour
You get a pulled over on your way to the coffee shop and tell the cop your about to have a coffee relapse, and he let's you go.
The only bumper stickers you see on cars is Gore/Lieberman 2000 along with Free Tibet
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Old Oct 7, 2003 | 11:17 PM
  #5  
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From: Kansas City & Maysville, MO
Re:Commiefornia

But seriously, is pot illegal?

Constitution says it's not. Or more precisely, doesn't say it is. Smoke 'em if you got 'em!
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 08:38 AM
  #6  
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From: Bristol Michigan
Re:Commiefornia

Not illegal to poke your own eye out either.


What about when the signs on the bathrooms don't corollate with who you see going in?

What's a "unisex"? New cloning project?
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 08:59 AM
  #7  
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From: beyond all borders
Re:Commiefornia

Morning after the election, and they're replacing all of the signs at the state borders:

"Ya! Velcome to Kah-lee-forn-ee-ah!"
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 09:30 AM
  #8  
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From: The 951-Flatbill center of the universe
Re:Commiefornia

You guys are really making it sound much worse than it isn't......

Quote from the news this morning, (in a state where every executive post is held by a democrat, and most of the legislature is democrat) "I'm horrified at the thought that Schwarzenegger can be our governor," said Gretchen Purser, 25, of Berkeley, who voted against recall. "I'm sick of Republicans trying to take over the state."

Again, keep in mind this poor delusional girl is from Berkley, where weeds have to be pulled by hand because herbicides are illegal, red curbs have to be painted with water based paint, and city council members openly spark up doobies in front of the police chief.

In addition, the Bay Area overwhelmingly voted to keep Gray Davis in office. And people wonder why California is circling the drain.....

BTW, you guys forgot the "Meat is Murder" and gay pride stickers next to the "Free Tibet" stickers......

I'm really starting to hate this place.......off the soapbox now...
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 09:45 AM
  #9  
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From: SC
Re:Commiefornia

Move to the south east coast.

Pot is illegal, no one grows it, not many sell it (always get caught because everybody knows everybody) and you never see it...I don't think.

trip to work is 6 miles takes 6 mins and see 2 cars. You get pulled over and you either went to school with him or he is related somehow. Men are MEN and women are women and polite and they know which bathroom to use. Gays are quiet , but you know who they all are, and there are several "towns" and or areas that lots of people will not go to! It gets country real quick.........

disclamer: the closer you are to the coast, the more like cali you get. Have to be at least 200 miles in...Heart of Dixie.

I love where I live!
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 11:57 AM
  #10  
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From: Branchville, Alabama
Re:Commiefornia

[quote author=JKE link=board=10;threadid=20696;start=0#msg194357 date=1065624316]
Move to the south east coast.

Pot is illegal, no one grows it, not many sell it (always get caught because everybody knows everybody) and you never see it...I don't think.

trip to work is 6 miles takes 6 mins and see 2 cars. You get pulled over and you either went to school with him or he is related somehow. Men are MEN and women are women and polite and they know which bathroom to use. Gays are quiet , but you know who they all are, and there are several "towns" and or areas that lots of people will not go to! It gets country real quick.........

disclamer: the closer you are to the coast, the more like cali you get. Have to be at least 200 miles in...Heart of Dixie.

I love where I live!
[/quote]

Now not to be argumentive but the "Heart of Dixie" is actually Montgomery Alabama Did you ever reference what Alabama's biggest cash crop is? Hmmmm, pot. Pot and other dope is part of the fabric of all states. On the good side, Alabama has a lot less taxation and frivilous (can't spell) laws than the rest of the SE. Coming down the freeway says it all, you run scared at 68 in Georgia and the traffic automatically pickups to 75 at the Alabama line. Sweet Home Alabam
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 12:29 PM
  #11  
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JKE
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From: SC
Re:Commiefornia

Correct on Alabama, Not to take away from the true meaning

I just like to think of the south in general as good old Dixie. This 5 state area is really nice for country folk. As for pot, you see very little here. Maybe in your neck of the woods there is a cash crop, but not here.

Alabama is sweet, been there a couple of times to visit family. 8)

John
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 02:17 PM
  #12  
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From: Kansas City & Maysville, MO
Re:Commiefornia

[quote author=Cowhand link=board=10;threadid=20696;start=0#msg194353 date=1065623440]
Again, keep in mind this poor delusional girl is from Berkley, where weeds have to be pulled by hand because herbicides are illegal, red curbs have to be painted with water based paint, and city council members openly spark up doobies in front of the police chief.
[/quote]

Not for nothing do they call it Bezerkley... Last time I was there was about 15 years ago, and it was over-the-top weird even then.
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 02:27 PM
  #13  
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From: San Diego, CA
Re:Commiefornia

I feel so abused, my only bumper sticker is a DTR sticker.

On the plus side, I can go in our ocean all year round, the sun is out and the weather is warm.

Don't forget we can taste the difference between a good beer and a bad beer. Can tell by color, aroma, and taste which microbrew is in front of us.
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 04:35 PM
  #14  
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From: The 951-Flatbill center of the universe
Re:Commiefornia

Guess I'm not a REAL Californian, I can tell the difference between Bud Light, Coors, and Miller. That's about as far as I can go......
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Old Oct 8, 2003 | 05:09 PM
  #15  
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JKE
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From: SC
Re:Commiefornia

thank you cowhand!
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