Rednecks versus Stump Jumpers
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It's my pot and I'll stir it if I want to. If you're not careful, I'll stir your's as well!

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From: Central Mexico.
Rednecks versus Stump Jumpers
Have just read an article written by a woman, Gail Nott, that perhaps some of you can relate to. BTW, what IS a Stump Jumper? Here is the article:
I am pretty thick-skinned and insults don't bother me, probably because most of the time I don't understand them. However I took exception when someone called me a Redneck. I am proud of my lineage as a Stump Jumper but if you think a Stump Jumper is synonymous with with a Redneck, maybe you just don't understand the cultural differences.
Stump Jumpers are not a drain on the overworked medical system. Rednecks reportedly eat road kill. Jumpers use the remains to create asphidity bags which they hang around the necks of their kids. While they never cured a thing, they do deter socialization and the spreading of germs. They have also been shown to work well for birth control. If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em.
Jumpers are environmently friendly. You won't see them throw cigarette butts out the window. Pick-up trucks have a mandatory pouch of Red Man and a "spit cup". It is not recommended that adults or children ride in the back of truck if the cup is missing.
Stump Jumpers do not have gun racks in their trucks; they prefer the element of surprise. Their shotgun rests snuggly against the drivers door. As they drift up to a parked car with the lights off, fathers are confident that when the gun barrel taps the car window, boyfriends and daughters will have their hands visable and clothes adjusted.
Jumpers appreciate art and are very creative. Furniture is covered with cross-stitched and crocheted doilies made by generations of women. We never quite understand a plastic covered sofa. A stack of grandma's handmade quilts staved off many a winter nights chill. Did you know you can put up to five skinny little kids under one pile of quilts?
We do not waste natural resources. You will not find aluminium cans or plastic containers in our pantry. It we grew it or it flew, swan, walked or waddled, it was packed in a glass Mason jar. Yes, you can fit an entire squirrel or rabbit in a jar. However coons and groundhogs require a bit more brute force. Food identification at times can be tricky. If you think you heard a Tupperware burp at the table it is suggested that you check out the person sitting next to you.
Meals are prepared in one galvanized pot. Buckshot falls to the bottom and fur, tiny bones and feathers float to the top. it is not advisable to be the first or the last one served. Place settings of multiple dishes and flatware are viewed as wasteful and frivolous. Meals require one fork, one knife and one spoon. If you are lucky you might get all three. Well, that depends on how many there are at the table. If properly executed, a piece of bread will clear the remains of dinner from your plate creating space for dessert. Stump Jumpers do experience some difficulty when ordering place settings for newlyweds at Target.
Jumpers are very wise people. When a woman knows where her husband is every night, it is likely she is a widow. Gals know better than to pick up anything in a singles bar; you just don't know where it's been. You never date a guy who has been married three times and still has the same in-laws. And don't forget, ya never let a good huntin' dog in the house. It ruins their nose.
I am pretty thick-skinned and insults don't bother me, probably because most of the time I don't understand them. However I took exception when someone called me a Redneck. I am proud of my lineage as a Stump Jumper but if you think a Stump Jumper is synonymous with with a Redneck, maybe you just don't understand the cultural differences.
Stump Jumpers are not a drain on the overworked medical system. Rednecks reportedly eat road kill. Jumpers use the remains to create asphidity bags which they hang around the necks of their kids. While they never cured a thing, they do deter socialization and the spreading of germs. They have also been shown to work well for birth control. If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em.
Jumpers are environmently friendly. You won't see them throw cigarette butts out the window. Pick-up trucks have a mandatory pouch of Red Man and a "spit cup". It is not recommended that adults or children ride in the back of truck if the cup is missing.
Stump Jumpers do not have gun racks in their trucks; they prefer the element of surprise. Their shotgun rests snuggly against the drivers door. As they drift up to a parked car with the lights off, fathers are confident that when the gun barrel taps the car window, boyfriends and daughters will have their hands visable and clothes adjusted.
Jumpers appreciate art and are very creative. Furniture is covered with cross-stitched and crocheted doilies made by generations of women. We never quite understand a plastic covered sofa. A stack of grandma's handmade quilts staved off many a winter nights chill. Did you know you can put up to five skinny little kids under one pile of quilts?
We do not waste natural resources. You will not find aluminium cans or plastic containers in our pantry. It we grew it or it flew, swan, walked or waddled, it was packed in a glass Mason jar. Yes, you can fit an entire squirrel or rabbit in a jar. However coons and groundhogs require a bit more brute force. Food identification at times can be tricky. If you think you heard a Tupperware burp at the table it is suggested that you check out the person sitting next to you.
Meals are prepared in one galvanized pot. Buckshot falls to the bottom and fur, tiny bones and feathers float to the top. it is not advisable to be the first or the last one served. Place settings of multiple dishes and flatware are viewed as wasteful and frivolous. Meals require one fork, one knife and one spoon. If you are lucky you might get all three. Well, that depends on how many there are at the table. If properly executed, a piece of bread will clear the remains of dinner from your plate creating space for dessert. Stump Jumpers do experience some difficulty when ordering place settings for newlyweds at Target.
Jumpers are very wise people. When a woman knows where her husband is every night, it is likely she is a widow. Gals know better than to pick up anything in a singles bar; you just don't know where it's been. You never date a guy who has been married three times and still has the same in-laws. And don't forget, ya never let a good huntin' dog in the house. It ruins their nose.
Re:Rednecks versus Stump Jumpers
what is a stump jumper??
http://www.fourwheeler.com/featuredvehicles/49478/
It's a monster truck...
http://www.ecea.org/results/enduro/2...02/index.shtml
It's a motor cycle enduro...
http://www.stump-jumper.com/pages/history.html
it's a shallow water boatmotor...
http://www.deviousconcoctions.com/stumpjumper.htm
and it's a halloween gimic...
I don't see any reference to people. I have always known a stump jumper to be a modified vehicle for crashing through the bush... :P
http://www.fourwheeler.com/featuredvehicles/49478/
It's a monster truck...
http://www.ecea.org/results/enduro/2...02/index.shtml
It's a motor cycle enduro...
http://www.stump-jumper.com/pages/history.html
it's a shallow water boatmotor...
http://www.deviousconcoctions.com/stumpjumper.htm
and it's a halloween gimic...
I don't see any reference to people. I have always known a stump jumper to be a modified vehicle for crashing through the bush... :P
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