Is there anybody else here that gets really "tired" of their mother-in-law? Or is it just only me?

 

Nah, sorry... I got the other kind. I am blessed.

 

I've been married for almost 4 years (December 17th - Please REMIND ME!!!!) and we have an 18mo. old. Before I made it clear to her (MIL) that this was MY family and not her's to run, we had issues. Now those are few and far between.

When we first got together she would try to tell us what we were going to be doing and would call all the time just to see what we were up to. So I told the wife that this bugged me and we decided we would let the answering machine get it when we were busy or just didn't want to tell her where we were or what we were doing...

What's your's doing????



Lets not turn this into a MIL bashing, but use each other to figure out a solution.... After all, like it or not, you are family now...

 

Well mine is a little different, she is a alcolholic, and we suspect she is into drugs. THANKFULLY None of her kids have followed in her footsteps, and are doing really well.
There have been a number of times that she has told other people that "I threatened her" And Fellas let me tell you there is NO way that I would threaten a woman nor would i lay a hand on one.
She also has let my wife down SO many times it just angers me.

I try my best to just keep my mouth shut.. But it seems to me and a few others that she just "digs" into somebody untill they "snap back", then she uses that against that person...

Im prolly just venting, so please excuse me.

Im also with CODODGE2500MAN on maybe some of us can find a solution.

 

I believe you are in the right place for venting...

I would say above all (obviously, and I bet you are) just support your wife. Having her realize that she will be let down and can be surprised if she isn't is the hard part.

If it was me, I'd just stay away from her. If there were other members of the family she liked, I'd let them take care of her or help her get help for herself.

 

I love my MIL but absolutely can't stand the FIL. I've had to kick him out of my house once and have never taken a liken to him (just don't trust him). Grown men aren't supposed to act like that around thier children and MY kids. Luckily he doesn't come around much anymore but when he does, I hit the shop and stay away.

 

for mom in law that has personal issues, that game will stay the same.

anyone, socially, that pushes until a response is actually passive /aggressive behavior resulting in a attention getting or denying blame (see? other people are mean to me, so help me) type situation.

the best way to stop or head her off at the pass, if you will; is to change the subject cheerfully. make sure her problems are just that. her problems.
not to affect anyone in your home.
defeating this behavior keys:

no confrontation. verbally asking Is everything alright? you seem overly medicated. should an ambulance be called? what doctor? maybe I should take you home instead of you driving.

limit the time she comes/stays at your home. before the kids get home from school. meet for lunch with her daughter at her work or outside of..
Usually, this is a control issue- limit her control to stop the games, they will get worse, maybe violent (smashing prized items and such)

best of luck , talk with the wife and siblings and limit the chances she comes to the house by way of 'caring for her' and making her responsible for her actions/comments/situation of complaints.

yeah. vent . good for you!

 

My Mother in law is just like my wife...a true Angel and a blessing to be around. I am sorry that some of you guys do not have the same thing in your family's I hope you are able to work out the issues because family is all we have left in this country.

 

To those who have great MILs congrats but try not to rub it in too much!. My MIL cant stant me, and I cant stand her....My wife and I have had our problems in the past and the MIL will not forgive, as she is no saint either neither will I. The best thing I can recommend is just to be polite and quiet and dont get envolved. I have tried to express myself (that leads to fights), Ive gotten drunk in the corner bymyself not at all good. And last year I avoided in-law gatherings all together, and that hurt my wife very much. So now I just try to get through the holidays with my in-laws, I dont talk too much (which is very hard for a guy like me) and I just suffer quietly for the sake of my wife....Sorry for the rambling, but HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL and I hope everything goes well....

 

Both of my MIL's live more than 7 hours away...

 

BOTH of your mothers in law???

Gotta be a southern thing. Or else you're from Utah originally

 

FOR YOU YOUNGSTERS THAT ARE TWO YOUNG TO REMBER >
WE USE TO HAVE SERVICE STATIONS > THEY ACTULLY PUMPED YOUR GAS >
CHECKED YOUR OIL & WASHED YOUR WINSHIELD >

AT THE GROVERY STORE THEY HAD SURVICE MEAT COUNTERS>
THE MEAT WOULD BE CUT & STACKED NEATLY IN A GLASS FRONT -REFREGRATED COUNTER
THERE WOULD BE AN ACTUAL PERSON BEHIND THIS COUNTER TO WAIT ON YOU ( ACTULLY SEVERAL ) THEY WOULD HELP YOU MAKE YOUR DESISHION ON WHAT PIECE OF MEAT TO BUY AND WRAP & WEIGH IT AND PRICE IT >

A COMMON ANSWER TO ( IS THAT A TENDER CUT OF MEAT ) WAS<
MORE TENDER THAN A MOTHER-INLAW`S LOVE
CLAUDE
SPENT A LONG TIME ON THE BACK SIDE OF ONE OF THOSE COUNTERS
THINKING THAT SEVERAL OF US WHOULD HAVE MADE GOOD USED CAR SALESMEN

 

OMG. The MIL is here now, digging out every possible Christmas decoration known to mankind, stacking them all over the dang place, and I'm quite sure that if she will ever shutup and leave, she will not put them back. She also in incapable of a single second of silence and has to super-overanalyze every aspect of every thought known to mankind. Her stuff is perfect. Our stuff is all trash. Her car is perfect. Our cars and truck is the most dangerous vehicles to ever roll on a highway. If she wouldn't buy it then we shouldn't either. I could go on and on and on and on and on and on and.......

Does anybody want a free MIL?

 

I'm like stinky. My MIL was fantastic. I loved her dearly. She passed away in September. What a fantastic lady she was and my FIL is a fine man too. I'm not trying to rub it in but I am truly blessed.

 

Yeah, my wife's mom and step mom.

I'm from the redneck part of Fl...