I just couldn’t help I self, I had to share this with the ones at need rules to happiness


the Guys' Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.


Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!


1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.


1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

 

Good one! How true some of these are! (Comin' from a single guy too)

 

Oh that's pretty good if I must say so!!!

 

Many truths there...

 

One thing that maybe could be added to the list, Marriage is Grand, but Divorce is fifty Grand. waam Holland, Mich.

 

Just about all were true in my book, heck maybe every one

 

If i might add one:

1. Candy's dandy but liquors quicker.

 

I couldent help but notice that they are all labled # 1

 

how about:
1. burps and farts are loud and make us feel good. We don't do spa and pedicures like you. handle it

 

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Guns, Guns, our Cummins or gutting Deer, deal with it.

 

Here's one
1. If you don't like the way I do things, then do them yourself.

 

yeah, CIN, like they would ever do that....lol we are treading water in here

Heidi

 

It can all be summed up in five words: lose weight and put out!

 

Haha thats funny also get me another beer!

 

Thank you for making my day.