Poor as a church mouse.

 

Colder than a banker's heart

 

Florida...heaven's waiting room.

 

Confucius say...

Man that is stuck in pantry has his *butt* in jam.

Man standing on toilet is high on pot.

Edit

Man who stick foot in mouth get athlete's tongue.

Man who live in glass house should not throw parties.

When called an idiot sometimes is better to be quiet, than open mouth and remove all doubt.

Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly.

Virginity like bubble, one "poke of a needle"(PG) all gone.

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.

Edit

Man who drive like hell bound to get there.

Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

 

I'm so hungry.......

I'm so hungry I could eat the butt out of a dead horse

I'm so hungry my belly button is eatin' at my back bone

I'm so hungry my stomach thinks my throats been cut

 

This thread is:

Funnier than two porcupines in a balloon factory.

 

You could practically write a paragraph using nothing but these phrases!