dumb tales of how you hurt yourself
DTR's Night Watchman & Poet Laureate
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: Lyndon KS
Gawd, dont know if I want to reply to this one...
1966: 5 yrs old, Slidell La, Open house at the Babtist Church, was playing under a suspended bell when it fell..... 113 stitches, two bone grafts and numerous cuts, bruises and broken bones.. teh top-plate of my skull is still a little loose...( stupid because they had the area taped off, I ignored it)
1971 9 yrs old, Grandpa got one of the first adoption BLM mustangs and brought it home... it had been there about 2 weeks when bright little me decides to jump on it back from teh fence........concussion, lost a few teeth and scared Grandma out of a few years.....if I had been older, I'd have said " hold my beer and watch this" first...
1982m while securing a small boat that broke loose( underway in a hurricane off the yuctan penninsula) and was swinging on teh davits, smashed my left hand and broke all four fingers and the wrist. ( stupid 'cause I had just finished warning another guy to be carefull where he put his hands)
1988- Standing on teh block of my CJ7 changing a light bulb over it so i could keep working, slipped and fell, caught myself with my left arm and drove teh ulna right on through the skin, breaking the tip of the Ulna off and shattering the ball of the elbow joint.( now is very brittle and breaks easily, at least 4 times now since this one)
1993, while attempting a DUI arrest, was drug under a minivan for about 150 yards, tore both left ACL's, fractured three ribs, fractured my jaw, concussion, and tore the large muscle of my thigh loose..( stupid, I tryed to reach thru the window and ****** the keys when i saw he was gonna take off)
1995 while responding to a Domestic Dispute, clubbed in the face with a telephone receiver and stabbed with a meat fork....minor puncture wounds to my left abdomen, fractured cheekbone, disrupted eye( hanging half out of the socket), four teeth and a fractured jaw( he went to jail in MY cuffs!!)
stupid 'casue I went ahead and responded with a rookie back-officer I didnt trust and I knew better)
1996- slammed into the side of a semi truck by a 3500lb Belgian Draft Mule, crushed the lower three veterbrae of the lumbar, broke my jaw and two more teeth gone..( stupid, got in wher there was no way out)
1997, dumped by a bull while riding at the Will Rodger Colilseum in Amarrillo,
4 ribs, and the jaw again ( stupid? getting talked into riding a bull..need I say more?)
2002 thrown by a colt and landed on a 2 inch flat rock, split my left scapula from top to bottom( basically broke my shoulder clean off)not stupid, but funny, it was the only dern rock in a pasture of tall soft grass....
2002 Double barrelled by a filly, busted a rib and buised my kidneys, crushed a part of my spleen...( this one has come the closest to killing me, stupid because I walked behind her in just the right spot to get nailed)
2004 thrown and drug by a mare in training, 5 ribs, left knee ACL, right ankle broken, left shoulder dilocated and rotor cuff torn. 3 teeth and teh jaw again!...( stupid, I had given up on this mare and she was going home, and I said, "just one more try....")
1966: 5 yrs old, Slidell La, Open house at the Babtist Church, was playing under a suspended bell when it fell..... 113 stitches, two bone grafts and numerous cuts, bruises and broken bones.. teh top-plate of my skull is still a little loose...( stupid because they had the area taped off, I ignored it)
1971 9 yrs old, Grandpa got one of the first adoption BLM mustangs and brought it home... it had been there about 2 weeks when bright little me decides to jump on it back from teh fence........concussion, lost a few teeth and scared Grandma out of a few years.....if I had been older, I'd have said " hold my beer and watch this" first...
1982m while securing a small boat that broke loose( underway in a hurricane off the yuctan penninsula) and was swinging on teh davits, smashed my left hand and broke all four fingers and the wrist. ( stupid 'cause I had just finished warning another guy to be carefull where he put his hands)
1988- Standing on teh block of my CJ7 changing a light bulb over it so i could keep working, slipped and fell, caught myself with my left arm and drove teh ulna right on through the skin, breaking the tip of the Ulna off and shattering the ball of the elbow joint.( now is very brittle and breaks easily, at least 4 times now since this one)
1993, while attempting a DUI arrest, was drug under a minivan for about 150 yards, tore both left ACL's, fractured three ribs, fractured my jaw, concussion, and tore the large muscle of my thigh loose..( stupid, I tryed to reach thru the window and ****** the keys when i saw he was gonna take off)
1995 while responding to a Domestic Dispute, clubbed in the face with a telephone receiver and stabbed with a meat fork....minor puncture wounds to my left abdomen, fractured cheekbone, disrupted eye( hanging half out of the socket), four teeth and a fractured jaw( he went to jail in MY cuffs!!)
stupid 'casue I went ahead and responded with a rookie back-officer I didnt trust and I knew better)
1996- slammed into the side of a semi truck by a 3500lb Belgian Draft Mule, crushed the lower three veterbrae of the lumbar, broke my jaw and two more teeth gone..( stupid, got in wher there was no way out)
1997, dumped by a bull while riding at the Will Rodger Colilseum in Amarrillo,
4 ribs, and the jaw again ( stupid? getting talked into riding a bull..need I say more?)
2002 thrown by a colt and landed on a 2 inch flat rock, split my left scapula from top to bottom( basically broke my shoulder clean off)not stupid, but funny, it was the only dern rock in a pasture of tall soft grass....
2002 Double barrelled by a filly, busted a rib and buised my kidneys, crushed a part of my spleen...( this one has come the closest to killing me, stupid because I walked behind her in just the right spot to get nailed)
2004 thrown and drug by a mare in training, 5 ribs, left knee ACL, right ankle broken, left shoulder dilocated and rotor cuff torn. 3 teeth and teh jaw again!...( stupid, I had given up on this mare and she was going home, and I said, "just one more try....")
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From: Buffalo, NY
Pulling the stuck receiver hitch out of my 95, I hooked a strap up to a telephone pole in our parking lot, hooked the other end to the receiver that was frozen in, and pulled... nothing happened the first time with the truck rolling, so I gave it some throttle and rammed my face into the steering wheel when it still didn't budge, put my bottom lip set of teeth right through my lip, and left a bit mark in the steering wheel... 30 some stitches later I was alright, but I won't do that again, at least without a seatbelt on.
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From: Magnolia, Tx
When i was 14 i was sharpening/ playing my skinning knife, I tried to fling the knife open by the blade ( obviously a stupid decision) the knife went into my calf with the handle sticking out the front and about 1/2" of the blade out the back. I freaked, pulled it out and ran around my room spewing blood everywhere. My brother duck taped it for me to stop the bleeding until i could get to the hospital......
6 months later I get done swimming and decided i was going to play with a hatchet. Was cutting a piece of hay twine on a block of wood. ( Remind you i am wearing no shoes.
) I skip off the wood and landed the blade in between the middle of my big toe and 2nd toe. Pulled it out and it made a clean cut but my big toe was dragging as i was trying to get inside to get help.
and recently got into a wreck with my boss. He was driving about 60 in rainy weather and went around a curve lost control and we slammed in to a concrete support that holds up an overpass. My arm went through the back window cutting through my bicep of my left arm. 6" long 2" wide and 2" deep. Had to get some stitches but at least that was the worst thing that happened. its taking a while to heal and get use out of my arm again.
Lesson learned: I shouldn't play with sharp objects or ride with stupid drivers
) the knife went into my calf with the handle sticking out the front and about 1/2" of the blade out the back. I freaked, pulled it out and ran around my room spewing blood everywhere. My brother duck taped it for me to stop the bleeding until i could get to the hospital......6 months later I get done swimming and decided i was going to play with a hatchet. Was cutting a piece of hay twine on a block of wood. ( Remind you i am wearing no shoes.
) I skip off the wood and landed the blade in between the middle of my big toe and 2nd toe. Pulled it out and it made a clean cut but my big toe was dragging as i was trying to get inside to get help.and recently got into a wreck with my boss. He was driving about 60 in rainy weather and went around a curve lost control and we slammed in to a concrete support that holds up an overpass. My arm went through the back window cutting through my bicep of my left arm. 6" long 2" wide and 2" deep. Had to get some stitches but at least that was the worst thing that happened. its taking a while to heal and get use out of my arm again.
Lesson learned: I shouldn't play with sharp objects or ride with stupid drivers
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 485
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From: Twin Cities Mn
Ya, I'm with the crew on this one ... seriously Chris I've never heard of anyone with more broken bones ... either start doing it professionally as a stunt man so you can get paid to get injured or get a desk job, wow
Muted one day, Banned the next....... Ah the life of a DTR 1%'er
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From: Ohio: Home of the disappointing sports teams
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Joined: Mar 2006
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From: Fort Collins, CO
I was taking the rear driveshaft off of my old Jeep Cherokee on my driveway a couple years ago. The Jeep was in 2wd, and I didn't chock the wheels (D'oh!). The last bolt on the yoke was really difficult to get off (I wonder why) and as soon as it popped off, the Jeep rolled backwards down the driveway. My roommate got out before it hit him, but it ended up rolling over my foot. Not a serious injury by any means (had some bruised/sore toes) but it could have been a lot worse. I still can't believe I did that!
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From: Hills of West Virginia
Well it hasn't been a year yet since my own car ran over me
As you can see my arm didn't do so well and fragmented all the bones so that the doctor really didn't have anything to piece together so they bolted a metal rod from above the breakage to below.
A couple years ago I was riding my horse down the road and a van hit us about 45 mph and totaled the van. My horse and I actually lived.
A couple months before that I was splitting wood and I was using a splitting wedge on a knotty log and hit it with the sledge end of the mallet and a piece of metal shot off like a bullet and went right through my jeans and through my thigh to come to rest against my femur bone. The whole leg of my jeans was immediately wet and soaked with blood. That was a fun surgery.
This winter some buddies and I were riding around the hill during muzzle loader season last winter in a Ole 53 *****'s jeep with the top off of course and we pulled up in this swamp and I decided to shoot a cat tail. Half of it shot off and the other half was sitting their smoldering so I broke it off and was holding it while my buddy was going to pure " one " measured load out off his " Full " powder measurer and needless to say the whole thing blew up in my face and I couldn't hear anything but this high pitched noise for 2 days. Talk about a flash burn. I spent six months picking black powder out of
my face and hands.
This is all the stuff that has happened in the last couple years.
I couldn't begin to tell you all the dumb stuff I have got hurt doing.
As you can see my arm didn't do so well and fragmented all the bones so that the doctor really didn't have anything to piece together so they bolted a metal rod from above the breakage to below.
A couple years ago I was riding my horse down the road and a van hit us about 45 mph and totaled the van. My horse and I actually lived.
A couple months before that I was splitting wood and I was using a splitting wedge on a knotty log and hit it with the sledge end of the mallet and a piece of metal shot off like a bullet and went right through my jeans and through my thigh to come to rest against my femur bone. The whole leg of my jeans was immediately wet and soaked with blood. That was a fun surgery.
This winter some buddies and I were riding around the hill during muzzle loader season last winter in a Ole 53 *****'s jeep with the top off of course and we pulled up in this swamp and I decided to shoot a cat tail. Half of it shot off and the other half was sitting their smoldering so I broke it off and was holding it while my buddy was going to pure " one " measured load out off his " Full " powder measurer and needless to say the whole thing blew up in my face and I couldn't hear anything but this high pitched noise for 2 days. Talk about a flash burn. I spent six months picking black powder out of
my face and hands.
This is all the stuff that has happened in the last couple years.
I couldn't begin to tell you all the dumb stuff I have got hurt doing.
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From: CT
Dshiftff, that remided me of how I smashed my thumb recently.
I was de-burring the edges of a piece 1/8th inch plate aluminum, with a stationary disc sander . I held the plate at a bad angle to the disc, and it grabbed the plate. It took the plate and before I could react, it had smashed my thumb hard against the sander frame. That's when I let go. It then threw the plate against the wall behind at warp speed. It hit and clattered to the floor. Luckily it didn't rebound elsewhere (like my shins). My thumb hurt like heck the rest of the day. Here's how mine ended up :
I was de-burring the edges of a piece 1/8th inch plate aluminum, with a stationary disc sander
. I held the plate at a bad angle to the disc, and it grabbed the plate. It took the plate and before I could react, it had smashed my thumb hard against the sander frame. That's when I let go. It then threw the plate against the wall behind at warp speed. It hit and clattered to the floor. Luckily it didn't rebound elsewhere (like my shins). My thumb hurt like heck the rest of the day. Here's how mine ended up :
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From: Dixon, IL
Rednecktastic, I love your story! I laughed until I cried!
The only thing I could think of was when I was "training" my 2 year old Belgian draft horse. She needed some time to get used to the halter and me leading her. So I went to go put her to pasture.....And the next thing I know is I am seeig hooves flying at my face with both of my hands clutched to the lead rope! Ya, we went around the pasture about half way (It was a good 100 yards) before I let go. So I thought I should show her who is boss. So I conjole her, pet her, and grab the lead rope. She went off like a shot. Now here I am, taking 20 ft strides thinking I could stop this 1200# animal with my 170 lbs. WRONG! I ended up sliding to the end of the rope, burning my hands, and at the same time she decides to make a sharp left hand turn. I was probably 20 ft away from wher she turned when I stopped rolling. Nothing hurt except my pride.
Jon
The only thing I could think of was when I was "training" my 2 year old Belgian draft horse. She needed some time to get used to the halter and me leading her. So I went to go put her to pasture.....And the next thing I know is I am seeig hooves flying at my face with both of my hands clutched to the lead rope! Ya, we went around the pasture about half way (It was a good 100 yards) before I let go. So I thought I should show her who is boss. So I conjole her, pet her, and grab the lead rope. She went off like a shot. Now here I am, taking 20 ft strides thinking I could stop this 1200# animal with my 170 lbs. WRONG! I ended up sliding to the end of the rope, burning my hands, and at the same time she decides to make a sharp left hand turn. I was probably 20 ft away from wher she turned when I stopped rolling. Nothing hurt except my pride.
Jon