Very sorry about your situation. As all have stated, get some help and consil on this, and don't take it out in front of your kids.

I will mention this briefly - since no one has yet. Did you think about calling the police when you found the door locked with a strange car in the driveway? At least in that case, you would have someone with authority with you when you entered. However, I know it's hard to think about that in the heat of the moment.

Praying for you...

 

Unforgivable, period.

Take care of your kids though. They will be the truly innocent victims of this whole mess.

 

Brings back those feelings when I tapped my phone. Know exactly how you feel. There has been some very good advice written on the post subject. Keep your cool, hold onto your children. Recource, marriages can be saved but with a lot of trust and God's grace. Pray, Pray hard and let God lead. I actually brought my 1st wife back home only to have her do it again. So, God lead a perfect woman to me and has been a great step-mom to my daughter. We now have 2 grand children and 1 more on the way. Stay strong brother!!! We're praying for you and the children.

 

May have been the night job...NOT that I'm on her side for what was done. Ask HER what "the" problem is.

 

IF it comes to changing out a wife, things can get a lot better. I changed out my wife of four years just about 31 years ago. I found the love of my life and have been married for 30 years.

One piece of advice: If you decide to divorce, make it a business decision (except for the kids). Keep emotion out of the equation as much as you can. Clear thinking about what has to be done could preclude problems in the future.

Hal

 

It's a darn shame to hear about these kind of things. Might want to explain to the kids what a "cougar" is.

 

re think the public site stuff....vent vent is good, but through PMs

long time legal person here, PMs welcome! married 27 years and worked through bad stuff.

Heidi

 

Thanks guys for the support and advice. I have been truly heart broken about this for about a week.. Just tearing up for no reason, co-workers and freinds are supporting me also. I am a shift worker, have been for 26yrs, I make good money. Everything I have worked for the last 8 years has been to support and build the family. I guess that's not enough for her. She needed some 13yrs her junior. Not only did she cheat on me, She cheated on our family and ruined the future of our children. I can not trust her ever again b/c, not only did she cheat, but she lied about it, and her true feelings for this fool... Hold that thought. I'm the fool...
I will be strong for my kids and as someone posted before, the boys mom will enjoy full respect from me infront of them. I will keep a centered view of the situation I am past angery, just numb about the whole thing. And soon the cougar will be gone on to #4...
The house will be sold via short sale and we both will most likley have to file for bankruptcy protection.. She realy threw a wrench in the works.. She has not really thought this out yet. I hope it hits her later.

 

No, I didnt think of that, But at the time, I was worried about her safety and my two little boys safety.. It wasnt until she said
"your not suppose to be here now" is when I realized what was going on..

 

Good Advice!
And I love my two little boys more than ever now.. They are "Mini Me's"

 

IH, I've been down the exact road you're on now. If you need to talk, shoot me a pm. I'll be back in later tonight.

 

You and the kids first!

Prayers man, that's a tough but all too common event these days. Find a support group.

Kurt

 

Looks like he already did, right here! Diesels are reliable, women arn't.

 

Make sure you both vent without being in front of the kids. That's the most important thing.


Handle it like a business decision like someone said above. Don't screw up your future just to screw hers up.

 

Like they have said, keep a cool head, she cheated and I'd be fighting for unfit mother and I would get custody of the kids. 8 years is a bit of time with one person, forget about her, move on. She ain't worth fussing or worrying over, she broke your trust. At least that's how I'd deal with it. If that happened around here I'd look at it as one less mouth to feed, less clothing, one less vehicle, less vehicle maintenance, larger bed, more counter space in the bathroom and a walk in closet....I can actually walk in to...Good luck man!