Canada Deals With Bush-Dodgers


The flood of American liberals sneaking across the
border into Canada has intensified in the past week,
sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the
illegal immigration.

The re-election of President Bush is prompting the
exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll
soon be required to hunt, pray and agree with Bill
O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see
dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights
activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at
night.

"I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there
was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said
Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders
North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted
and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and
some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have
any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my
screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield
erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them.
So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush
Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he
said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush
annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers
who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them
into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the
border, and leave them to fend for themselves.

"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged
conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I
found one carload without a drop of drinking water.
They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet,
though."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the
border, often wailing loudly that they fear
retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been
circulating about the Bush administration
establishing re-education camps in which liberals will
be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR.

In the days since the election, liberals have turned
to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border.

Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus
trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After
catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in
powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began
stopping buses and quizzing the supposed
senior-citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the
accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get
suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal
immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage
and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies.

"I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian
economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident
said. "How many art-history majors does one country
need?"

In an effort to ease tensions between the United
States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with
the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the
administration would take steps to reassure liberals,
a source close to Cheney said. "We're going to have
some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put
some endangered species on postage stamps. The
president is determined to reach out."


written by:
Gwendoline Y. Fortune, Ed. D.
Novels: Growing Up ****** Rich
Family Lines
http://xenarts.com/gunr/

 

It won't be long before the Canadians will ask for "liberal support", and Ted Kennedy introduces a bill to pay the deserters restitution.

Hey, I'd donate a few bucks to keep them up there.

 

Now that was a definate slap in the face to conservative and Bush supporters funny but highly controvertial. I agree with cobtex on the donation idea we have waaaayyy to many liberals in this country.
"the Bush administration
establishing re-education camps in which liberals will
be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR." thats not very nice

 

 

Liberals....Goodbye and goodridandce I heard a saying once. "Love it or leave it"
I say don't let the door **** hit ya where the good lord split ya

CJ

 

Kant stp laughing long nuff to tipe...

 

I think their sneaking across our border just to get their hands on some BC bud

 

The bit about not being prepared and not having water....but they did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet. Busts me up.

 

They all need to take a pill. I survived 8 years of Clinton.

 

Liberalism is a mental disorder.

 

those wimps are fleeing to Canada... , if they are so liberal why don't they go somewhere where they would be useful............................................ ........................like Iraq........

 

Volvo station wagons. Maybe there is some money in this for someone, like buying a bunch of old VW vans and running a 1 way shuttle service to the border for a small fee.

 

The only thing they are good for is complaining, they know all the problems but have no solutions. If Canada doesn't like us these days, they're really gonna hate a year from now after the freak flood .

 

We could use them in Iraq...they think they know it all and have answers for everything. Well, lets see them negotiate with the terrorist....