Ok guys, I need some advice here. I have a young 9 year old boy that is playing baseball this year. He is the smallest one on the team and everyone else has been in this league for a least 1 year and they play against some of the big 11 year olds you've seen. He has gone through t-ball and dixie league and this was the next step. Now here's my problem. He hates it. He's afraid of getting hit with the ball and it seems there is nothing I can do to help him. Last night he cried for 1 and 1/2 hours before the game saying he was scared and did not want to play. I finally talked him into it and he went and played a decent game but afterwards told the coaches he wanted to quit but they would not let him.

Should I just take him out? The game is not fun for him (or us) anymore and I feel like I'm being mean by forcing him to do something he does not want to do. I know I wouldn't want someone making me do something that I was terrified of. On the other hand, I want him to understand that once you obligate yourself to a team, you can't let them down. I can't stand to see my buddy go through this. What would you do?

 

He doesn't want to play, don't force him. 'Nuff said.

 

i was in the same boat your son is in. i didnt want to play baseball anymore, but my dad made me finish the season. dont make him do something he doesnt want to (within reason). just shop around till he finds a sport he will like. ie football or basketball, or maybe hockey

 

I agree ... he should be playing a sport because he likes it and is having fun doing it (that's why they call it playing).
Just let him know that you love him and aren't disappointed in him and then help him find something that he does like.

Good on ya, Dad !!!


PISTOL

 

Thanks for the support. I had made up my mind last night that he was through with it but I guess I needed some help convincing myself. I figured there were a bunch of dads on here that have "been there done that" and would have some words of wisdom.

I think with his situation it's beyond giving him that little "push" to get over it. He is so scared, he normally pees his pants while batting. Poor little guy.

 

When I was growing up and I started something my parents made me finish it. I'm glad they did because it has made me a stronger person I feel. The thing I was taught was if you have a problem, figure out how to beat it or correct. Try taking him down to the batting cages and get him use to the ball being thrown @ him. My 7 year old just started playing and loves it, everytime I get home from work she wants to go out in the backyard and play.

 

I agree. Don't force him to do it if he doesn't want to. But first talk to him. If his biggest fear is getting hit by the ball then talk to him and teach him how NOT to get hit by the ball. I went through that same thing when I used to play. I was scared to death about getting hit. And while my dad didn't force me, he coerced me into staying in and I'm glad I did. It's just one of those fears in life. The only reason I quit any sports was because they became to political and started being more about winning than having fun and that ruined it for me. But if he's dead set on quitting then by all means don't force him to play because he'll resent you for it. But if he's just got a couple of fears, then the only way to get over them is to face them. Good luck with your decision and I hope it all works out for you.

 

Don't force him, but what I find that works is to try to get him really interested in the game.

My little brother was in your kid's position; started baseball a bit late and he liked to screw around and make excuses for why he couldn't play rather than practice and pay attention.

The solution is to either let him quit or to act really interested in baseball; I downloaded a bunch of World Series games off of the Internet and acted excited about them. "Hey dude, watch this homer!" Since I was pretending to be excited, he got excited, and once he was excited I could go over every fly ball, home run, walk and otherwise explain the game's workings and qualities in a much greater detail that I could otherwise, and he loved it.

It worked great; he came away with an understanding and excitement of the game that eclipsed that of most of the other kids on the team, and he began to respect the game rather than make excuses about the sun being in his eyes.

After you sink the hook into him by watching a few games with him, buy him baseball cards. Or dig out your old baseball cards and give them to him 30 at a time. (A lot cheaper that way.)

Hopefully he'll become enthusiastic and work a lot harder, and have more fun as well. But you need to try to instill a strong intrest in him; if he remains unintrested, than baseball will probably never interest him and you need to start him in football, which is a real sport. Or soccer, perhaps, or la crosse (which is also fun), or basketball, or anything else.

 

He needs to learn not to quit, he started the season, he finishes the season and then next year let him decide. All too often these days young people just quit. Like buckshot stated it will make him learn to stay with things when things get tough, as in the tought get going when the going gets tough. You can help him work thru the batting problems. Goodluck,,Rick

 

Beagle has a pretty good idea there. I've coached a lot of kids over the years including my own. I would take him out maybe for a year or so. It won't hurt. You can work with him and keep the interest up. Develope the skills and the confidence. If you need some help there are a million youth baseball books. Then let him play again. You need to teach him to duck away from the ball and not into it as most kids do. It hurts but as they get older it become a "macho" thing when they get hit. A few tears and they are a hero for getting a walk. It's a fact of baseball. Fortunately there are good helmuts now. I'm missing a couple teeth from my early years that were unnecessary. Baseball is a great sport for kids to learn about life. It's ashame more kids don't stay with the sport. I just retired from adult baseball at 62. I simply hurt too much from a lifetime of sports. I still play softball but even that is pushing the edge for this body.

I lobbyed hard for pitching machine leagues for the younger kids and didn't have much luck from parents. They pay the bills. It seems dumb to me to see the walk a thons that happen in the youth leagues. This isn't baseball. The kids need to learn to hit the ball and what a good pitch is like, not play dodge ball with a baseball. I coached a lot with pitching machines and taught pitching in the bull pen. I can tell you that the kids will have better hitting and throwing skills this way than playing dodge ball. I taught fielding the same way. You can much more consistantly present the ball to the kids this way and be there to really instruct them. Most dads can't hit the ball or throw it any better than the kids do anyway.

This is a sore point with me so I better go get something to eat.

good luck

 

I think you're making the right decision by not forcing. (my wife would have ended it before I got a change to some DTR input )

Any chance at another sport? I don't suspect you have a "quitter" on your hands, but it would be nice to keep him in something organized.
I have been telling my son (now 11) that his IS doing something. We were cutting him slack because we used to live in a seriously Rural area, he had no (zero) friends within 15 miles of the house and no "real" local sports to participate in.
He'll be in Middle school next year, and it's up to him what he does, he's been warned. The new school district we are in has a wicked selection of sports.
I was forced to finish a season of Junior football. I was probably the most un-skilled kid on the team, (not to mention about 85lbs. ouch) my Dad wasn't interested in sports, or, ....uh, being a Dad for that matter so I had no real positive input on the sports tip.
Anyway, Mom made me finish that one. I went on to letter in Wrestling, Soccer and Tennis in H.S. I know, real gay, but whatever. Kept me busy and in shape.

 

isnt a matter of not quitting,or finishing what you started.....if he really pees his pants,,he is terrified,not just scared.....definitely let him quit.when he matures some more in a few years,if he wants to play,he will......bama

 

i played baseball when i was young and was dang good , hit a home run atleast every 3 games. when i was 12 i got hit by a pitch in the face(then i wasnt scared of a ball at all) it broke my nose in 2 places. the next game for some reason i was scared of the ball, it got to the point to were i said i diddnt want to play no more because it wasnt fun, realy i was just scared of the ball. so i quit for a year and got my head together. my step dad who had full rides in baseball worked with me. he would though a pitch hard as he could and i had to stand there. if i backed off he got to hit me with a pitch. i had to learn at that age getting hit by a pich aint going to kill u. the next year i was back to myself.

 

don't let him quit. do something constructive with him he may really enjoy. such as assistant coach, or put him incharge of taking care of the equipment, or waterboy what ever the TEAM needs. that may turn him around.

 

i was in the same perdicament (spelling?)

anyways i hated t-ball or whatever it was called. i remember mom taking me down there to pratice one time and i didnt even get out of the car. i finished and i never went back. Acually, I hate most sports that dont have ether a motor or 2+ wheels