Literary Putdowns
Literary Putdowns
"A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults." - Louis Nizer (1902 -1994)<br><br>"I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here." -<br>Stephen Bishop<br><br>"He is a self-made man & worships his creator." - John Bright<br><br>"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston<br>Churchill<br><br>"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." Winston Churchill<br><br>"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -<br>Irvin S. Cobb<br><br>"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great<br>pleasure." - Clarence Darrow<br><br>"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the<br>dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)<br><br>"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" -<br>Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)<br><br>"He has sat on the fence so long that the iron has entered his soul." -<br>David Lloyd George<br><br>"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading<br>it." - Moses Hadas<br><br>"His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open." - Howard<br>Hughes (about Clark Gable)<br><br>"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." -<br>Samuel Johnson<br><br>"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating<br><br>"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr<br><br>"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure." - Jack E.<br>Leonard<br><br>"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I<br>know." - Abraham Lincoln<br><br>"You've got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I bet he was glad to get<br>rid of it." - Groucho Marx<br><br>"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx<br><br>"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." - Robert Redford<br><br>"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human<br>knowledge." - Thomas Brackett Reed<br><br><br>"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -<br>Charles, Count Talleyrand<br><br>"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker<br><br>"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -<br>Mark Twain<br><br>"A solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was<br>waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity." - Mark Twain<br><br>"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of<br>it." - Mark Twain<br><br>"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West<br><br>"She is a peacock in everything but beauty." - Oscar Wilde<br><br>"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go." - Oscar<br>Wilde<br><br>"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." - Oscar Wilde<br><br>"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder<br><br>"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather<br>than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)<br><br>


