Things to Tork off a Cop!<br><br>When he asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.<br><br>When he talks to you, pretend you are deaf.<br><br>If he asks if you knew how fast you were going, say no, my<br>speedometer doesn't go that high.<br><br>Touch him.<br><br>When he asks you to spread them, tell him you don't go that way.<br><br>When he puts handcuffs on, say &quot;Usually my dates buy me dinner first&quot;<br><br>After you sign the ticket and give it to him, say &quot;Oops! That's the<br>wrong name.&quot;<br><br>When he comes up to the car, say &quot;License and registration, please&quot;<br>right when he says it.<br><br>When he goes to read you your rights, sing &quot;La La La, I can't hear<br>you!&quot;<br><br>Trip and fall into him.<br><br>Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes you away.<br><br>Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to use his pen.<br><br>Clean your ear with the pen.<br><br>If it's a click pen, take it apart and play with the spring.<br><br>Ask if he has a daughter. If he says yes, say I thought your name<br>sounded familiar....<br><br>Mumble to yourself.<br><br>When he comes to the car, say I have a badge just like yours!<br><br>Talk to your hand.<br><br>When he frisks you, say You missed a spot, and grin.<br><br>Play with the siren.<br><br>When you are in the back, touch his neck through the fencing.<br><br>When he pulls out his night stick, say what you gonna do with that.<br><br>If he sticks you in the back of the car, cower in the corner, suck<br>your thumb, and whine.<br><br>Ask if you can see his gun.<br><br>Tell him you like men in uniform.<br><br>

 

You guys are messed up

 

Hey Vet, those are pretty good. I'll cut and paste that and send it to a few people ;D<br><br>Ya know, those lights and sirens come in handy for emergency doughtnut runs!!!

 

I keep telling my wife I want some of those go-fast lights like those on top of the state black &amp; white cars. I also want one of those noise-makers that cause other drivers to stop at the side of the road. ;D ;D