Sam the Shrew is dead---RIP
08-13-2014, 09:03 AM
#901
DTR's Volcano Monitor, Toilet Smuggler, Taser tester, Meteorite enumerator, Quill counter, Match hoarder, Panic Dance Choreographer, Bet losing shrew murderer
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Kenai Alaska
Posts: 965
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Four days have passed now Without a post,
Has this thread finaly died, did it give up the ghost?
Have we run out of shrew humor and out of poo puns?
Can it be that at last we're done?
Bark would rejoice at this threads quick demise
And Sammy would vanish before the sunrise.
The forum would fall to it's usual rut,
With no talk of products from a shrew butt
With no lyrics parodied or pee and poo wit
What would Bark do? He'd be in deep ____
So hark all ye lurkers and poets-to-be
Let your mouths open,set your humor free!
We need not let Sammy wither and die,
Post some more prose, and let the poo fly!!!
Has this thread finaly died, did it give up the ghost?
Have we run out of shrew humor and out of poo puns?
Can it be that at last we're done?
Bark would rejoice at this threads quick demise
And Sammy would vanish before the sunrise.
The forum would fall to it's usual rut,
With no talk of products from a shrew butt
With no lyrics parodied or pee and poo wit
What would Bark do? He'd be in deep ____
So hark all ye lurkers and poets-to-be
Let your mouths open,set your humor free!
We need not let Sammy wither and die,
Post some more prose, and let the poo fly!!!
You just had to go and do it didn't you 
08-15-2014, 09:14 AM
#904
DTR's Night Watchman & Poet Laureate
I think I'm goin' to Barks to poo,
That's really really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbbb, Barks to poo,
I think it's really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!
I got no kick against the easy coast,
Scott and Heidi are such good hosts
I raise my laxative, and give 'em a toast,
I'm sure they know it's true
I got no rap against the southern states
Every time I've been there it's been great
But now I'm leavin' and I can't be late
And to myself be true
That's where I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaskawhere I'm going to poo
If I ever get out of herel
That's what I'm gonna do
I got no quarrel with the midwest
The folks out there have given me their best
I lived there all my life I've been their guest
I sure have loved it too
I'm tired of lookin' at the other shrews
I'm tired of drivin' hard and the pee'ng blues
I figure baby I've got nothing to lose
I'm tired of loosing poo!
That's why I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaska where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbb, Barks to poo
Take me baby cause I'm goin' with you
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!
I ain't got nothin' against the west coast
You want some poop, well they got the most
And New York City's like a toliet at most
You seem to pass right through
I know I'm gonna miss peeing spray
I guess I'll miss it every single day
But no one loves me here anyway
I know Bark loves me too
Thats why I'm going to Barks to poo
Up to the mountains where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbb, Barks to poo
Really really really I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!!
( piano riff)
That's really really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbbb, Barks to poo,
I think it's really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!
I got no kick against the easy coast,
Scott and Heidi are such good hosts
I raise my laxative, and give 'em a toast,
I'm sure they know it's true
I got no rap against the southern states
Every time I've been there it's been great
But now I'm leavin' and I can't be late
And to myself be true
That's where I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaskawhere I'm going to poo
If I ever get out of herel
That's what I'm gonna do
I got no quarrel with the midwest
The folks out there have given me their best
I lived there all my life I've been their guest
I sure have loved it too
I'm tired of lookin' at the other shrews
I'm tired of drivin' hard and the pee'ng blues
I figure baby I've got nothing to lose
I'm tired of loosing poo!
That's why I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaska where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbb, Barks to poo
Take me baby cause I'm goin' with you
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!
I ain't got nothin' against the west coast
You want some poop, well they got the most
And New York City's like a toliet at most
You seem to pass right through
I know I'm gonna miss peeing spray
I guess I'll miss it every single day
But no one loves me here anyway
I know Bark loves me too
Thats why I'm going to Barks to poo
Up to the mountains where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbb, Barks to poo
Really really really I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!!
( piano riff)
08-15-2014, 09:56 AM
#905
DTR Mom
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: hills of cali forn ya
Posts: 347
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OMG!!! I have been corrupted! any song I listen to while working comes back to evil Chris and his 'shrewed' lyrics....
(way to go man, really really funny stuff) when you finally crack from PSTD, I will talk you down....lol
(way to go man, really really funny stuff) when you finally crack from PSTD, I will talk you down....lol
08-15-2014, 03:55 PM
#909
Administrator
I think I'm goin' to Barks to poo,
That's really really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbbb, Barks to poo,
I think it's really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!
I got no kick against the easy coast,
Scott and Heidi are such good hosts
I raise my laxative, and give 'em a toast,
I'm sure they know it's true
I got no rap against the southern states
Every time I've been there it's been great
But now I'm leavin' and I can't be late
And to myself be true
That's where I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaskawhere I'm going to poo
If I ever get out of herel
That's what I'm gonna do
I got no quarrel with the midwest
The folks out there have given me their best
I lived there all my life I've been their guest
I sure have loved it too
I'm tired of lookin' at the other shrews
I'm tired of drivin' hard and the pee'ng blues
I figure baby I've got nothing to lose
I'm tired of loosing poo!
That's why I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaska where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbb, Barks to poo
Take me baby cause I'm goin' with you
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!
I ain't got nothin' against the west coast
You want some poop, well they got the most
And New York City's like a toliet at most
You seem to pass right through
I know I'm gonna miss peeing spray
I guess I'll miss it every single day
But no one loves me here anyway
I know Bark loves me too
Thats why I'm going to Barks to poo
Up to the mountains where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbb, Barks to poo
Really really really I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!!
( piano riff)
That's really really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbbb, Barks to poo,
I think it's really where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!
I got no kick against the easy coast,
Scott and Heidi are such good hosts
I raise my laxative, and give 'em a toast,
I'm sure they know it's true
I got no rap against the southern states
Every time I've been there it's been great
But now I'm leavin' and I can't be late
And to myself be true
That's where I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaskawhere I'm going to poo
If I ever get out of herel
That's what I'm gonna do
I got no quarrel with the midwest
The folks out there have given me their best
I lived there all my life I've been their guest
I sure have loved it too
I'm tired of lookin' at the other shrews
I'm tired of drivin' hard and the pee'ng blues
I figure baby I've got nothing to lose
I'm tired of loosing poo!
That's why I'm goin to Barks to poo
Up to Alaska where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbbb, Barks to poo
Take me baby cause I'm goin' with you
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!
I ain't got nothin' against the west coast
You want some poop, well they got the most
And New York City's like a toliet at most
You seem to pass right through
I know I'm gonna miss peeing spray
I guess I'll miss it every single day
But no one loves me here anyway
I know Bark loves me too
Thats why I'm going to Barks to poo
Up to the mountains where I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
That's what I'm gonna do
Bbbbbb, Barks to poo
Really really really I'm going to
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
If I ever get out of here
I'm goin to Barks to poo!!!
( piano riff)
You sir, are the MASTER.
08-15-2014, 05:03 PM
#911
Proprietor of Fiver's Inn and Hospitality Center
SSSSHHHHH, don't let Chris know about this post, but we have a problem. One of our members has hit it hard- - I mean, hard - - I mean has some major issues. I am suggesting we all contribute a buck or two each and hire a head shrink to wander by Chris's place impromptu and have a little chat with our boy - - this is getting serious. Next he will be out in his backyard with dump truck loads of shrew food feeding the little critters and trying to housebreak them. That will be just phase one of his plan. I am not sure I wish to read further in the plan to see what is next.
What say yeee? To do, or not to do? That is the question. I don't think even Bark could help him out. And by the time he gets up to Bark the shrews will be in hibernation and Bark and his sweet wife and daughter will have to entertain him all winter with gymnastics and feed him. This could be quite a problem brewing here, gang.
ConcernedBob
What say yeee? To do, or not to do? That is the question. I don't think even Bark could help him out. And by the time he gets up to Bark the shrews will be in hibernation and Bark and his sweet wife and daughter will have to entertain him all winter with gymnastics and feed him. This could be quite a problem brewing here, gang.
ConcernedBob
08-15-2014, 05:52 PM
#912
DTR's Night Watchman & Poet Laureate
SSSSHHHHH, don't let Chris know about this post, but we have a problem. One of our members has hit it hard- - I mean, hard - - I mean has some major issues. I am suggesting we all contribute a buck or two each and hire a head shrink to wander by Chris's place impromptu and have a little chat with our boy - - this is getting serious. Next he will be out in his backyard with dump truck loads of shrew food feeding the little critters and trying to housebreak them. That will be just phase one of his plan. I am not sure I wish to read further in the plan to see what is next.
What say yeee? To do, or not to do? That is the question. I don't think even Bark could help him out. And by the time he gets up to Bark the shrews will be in hibernation and Bark and his sweet wife and daughter will have to entertain him all winter with gymnastics and feed him. This could be quite a problem brewing here, gang.
ConcernedBob
What say yeee? To do, or not to do? That is the question. I don't think even Bark could help him out. And by the time he gets up to Bark the shrews will be in hibernation and Bark and his sweet wife and daughter will have to entertain him all winter with gymnastics and feed him. This could be quite a problem brewing here, gang.
ConcernedBob
I hadn't thought of training shrews to poo on command and sending them to Bark!!!! Excellent devious thinking Bob!! We can train thèm to poop at the sound of dawn breaking or at the cue of one hand clapping!
We can use the donations to pay for postage sending them via USPS....
Don't think I'd wanna deliver them and see Bark doing gymnastics....
But good thinking Bob!
08-15-2014, 06:03 PM
#913
DTR's Night Watchman & Poet Laureate
Bobby questions my sanity,
For jests concerning shrews that pee
He thinks my cracker may have slipped
Out from under the cheese a bit
But he misses the point, this is true,
This thread is for poems of shrews and poo
Just because my wit is sharp,
Means not that my mind is off it's mark
The aim is simple, but I will explain,
To drive poor Bark shrew-insane!
We jest and rhyme to give him fits,
And hope poor Sam don't have the ----s!!
For jests concerning shrews that pee
He thinks my cracker may have slipped
Out from under the cheese a bit
But he misses the point, this is true,
This thread is for poems of shrews and poo
Just because my wit is sharp,
Means not that my mind is off it's mark
The aim is simple, but I will explain,
To drive poor Bark shrew-insane!
We jest and rhyme to give him fits,
And hope poor Sam don't have the ----s!!
08-15-2014, 06:23 PM
#914
Proprietor of Fiver's Inn and Hospitality Center
Bobby questions my sanity,
For jests concerning shrews that pee
He thinks my cracker may have slipped
Out from under the cheese a bit
But he misses the point, this is true,
This thread is for poems of shrews and poo
Just because my wit is sharp,
Means not that my mind is off it's mark
The aim is simple, but I will explain,
To drive poor Bark shrew-insane!
We jest and rhyme to give him fits,
And hope poor Sam don't have the ----s!!
For jests concerning shrews that pee
He thinks my cracker may have slipped
Out from under the cheese a bit
But he misses the point, this is true,
This thread is for poems of shrews and poo
Just because my wit is sharp,
Means not that my mind is off it's mark
The aim is simple, but I will explain,
To drive poor Bark shrew-insane!
We jest and rhyme to give him fits,
And hope poor Sam don't have the ----s!!
...............By the way, not sure poor Bark would have too far to go to give him fits. His wife seems so normal - - amazing. ...........
