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I Hear Santa Clause Breakroom 12/23-12/29

Old 12-23-2018, 02:12 PM
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I Hear Santa Clause Breakroom 12/23-12/29

One more day, then it happens -- - roof clatter, chimney soot all over the house, boxes and stuff all
over the place, huge meals to put on more fat, overdraft notices from the bank. Wow, is it all
worth it? UUUHHHH YEEEEESSSS. Need to slow down once in a while and say thank you to
certain people in our lives. Need to stop and remember why we celebrate the day, and it wasn't to
buy a bunch of presents. Sooooooooooooooo, eat a lot, have fun with the family and those little
rascals the grandkids and great grandkids. We will be out at the ranch with the daughter, her three
children and her 3 grandchildren (our greats). Should be neat time. Her son is in the army and down
with his three kids.

Very cold this morning - - in the high 40's - - high today in low 60's. Tonight another high 40's, then it
starts to warm up to 80 on Friday.

Y'all hold on tight, don't be out sliding around on icy roads, enjoy and give thanks to live in America.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Bobby....lousy assortment of smilies now, so I will just skip it.
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Old 12-23-2018, 06:50 PM
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Thanks Mistletoe Bobby
Hope everyone has a great time over the next little while and beyond.
Lots to be thankful for. I focus there instead of the negatives.

Like Whats not to be positive about with an elder Twin like Lary the Legger and his lucious Leggs?
😀😜🥃🍺
Look at his Leggs! 🤮🤢🥴
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Old 12-24-2018, 05:46 AM
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Good morning from a Chilly Paradise. Winter is here! This means that most mornings are pretty cool and close to the freezing mark, but at least once the sun comes up, it warms up quickly. Sweater time early in the morning, but shorts time later in the day.

Coffee and ph00 is ready. Special no-name Christmas blends made in China.

Really Scotty! Why on earth would we want to look at Lary's Leggs? This spoils Christmas for many, particularly when you take a look at the definition of 'luscious';
luscious (lŭshˈəs)
  • adj.Sweet and pleasant to taste or smell: a luscious melon.
  • adj.Having strong sensual or sexual appeal; seductive.
  • adj.Richly appealing to the senses or the mind: a luscious, vivid description.


Read that in spite of the US government partial shutdown that NORAD is still going to track Santa. Have y'all been good? Will Santa have any coal for you?

Talking of Santa, it's time to post my annual question. Is Santa Claus dead?
Santa Claus: An Engineer's Perspective

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purpose of the calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles (1.3 km) per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles (125.83 million km), not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second (1083 km/s), 3000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest manmade vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at poky 27.4 miles per second (45.7 km/s), and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour (25 km/h) - that is four thousands of a mile (4/1000) per second (6.9 m/s).The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium size Lego set (two pounds, or 0.906 kg, that is), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons US (508,000 t metric), not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds (136 kg). Even granting that the “flying” reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with only eight or even nine of them - Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons (54,864 t metric), or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).600,000 tons (606,600 t metric) travelling at 650 miles per second (1083 km/s) creates enormous air resistance, and this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion Joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst in flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousands of a second (0.00426 s), or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from dead stop to 650 miles per second (1083 km/s) in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected top acceleration forces of 17,500 g’s. A 250 pound (113 kg) Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force (195,470 kg force, or 1.9547 MN), instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, the only conclusion for this is Christmas magic!

Enjoy the day wherever you are. Have family arriving this afternoon for our annual Christmas lunch. Tomorrow they all do their own thing with their individual families.

Ciao. MERRY CHRISTMAS. Remember the reason for the season and give lots of thanks.
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Old 12-24-2018, 08:11 AM
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We know the description of lucious hey Stanimal?
Exactly what his LEGGS are and what they represent.
Most alluringly
Lary wears these Festive Leggings that really emphasize his scars. Delightful!
When he arrives for Christmas dinner, a lull falls over the clan, awestruck wonderment. Speechlessness.
Jealousy.

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Old 12-24-2018, 09:12 AM
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Originally Posted by Scotty View Post
We know the description of lucious hey Stanimal?
Exactly what his LEGGS are and what they represent.
Most alluringly
Lary wears these Festive Leggings that really emphasize his scars. Delightful!
When he arrives for Christmas dinner, a lull falls over the clan, awestruck wonderment. Speechlessness.
Jealousy.

Back away from the egg nog and rum ***** big guy!
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Old 12-24-2018, 10:24 AM
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Dear Santa,
Anticipating an extremely cold winter I have been extra bad this year. So please, can I have some extra coal? It's not for me, it's for my wife and cat. They are very cold. We hit the minus side of zero this morning.
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Old 12-24-2018, 10:55 AM
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Dear Santa. Please stop it raining here, on the east coast.

I have gone through 10 bottles of Jomax on the back of my head from all the algae growth over the last several months. No need for Ronald Reagan hair goo for now, as my skin has lost its ability to grow hair on the back of my skull from all the algae remover. Hope that it stops raining, so I can finally grow my hair back, and not smell like a fungal parade any longer.

I'll send my coal from the last 29 years over to Cougar's wife and cat just as a showing of good faith.

Sincerely,

Greenback
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Old 12-24-2018, 01:02 PM
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You guys can keep the cold up there, but by all means send some rain. Have not had any decent rain for almost a month now, so things are quite dry and dusty. It's a very cool day down here, only 68F and with a mix of cloud and sun. No wind.

Another 2 hours and I can pig out on all the tasty food that I know is almost ready. Just took a look at all the food and told my wife that I suspect that we will be eating leftovers for the rest of the year. That is NOT a complaint!
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Old 12-24-2018, 08:10 PM
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LEGGS???? You just had to mention someone's ugly legs when I was ready to sit down at a luscious turkey dinner? What am I going to do with you, boy? Try and try to teach you and listen to it - - - yeh yeh yeh.

Just got in from the ranch and Christmas dinner a day early with our daughter, her daughter, her son and his wife and their 3 kids. Had a nice time - - don't see them enough. He is a Sgt. in the Army. Very nice time and the kids had a ball, and some bawling and screaming opening their presents. Quite a riot to watch - - nothing like we taught our kids. Great time and too full.

Winding down and cleaning up "stuff" around here for tomorrow. Hope Y'all have a wonderful Christmas and fellowship with friends and family.

Bob
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Old 12-24-2018, 09:28 PM
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I help Santa from time to time during this time of year. It's a little depressing when I realize how little white grease pencil I need to get rid of the red in my beard anymore. Anyway, here's an alternate view of Christmas. (It's a bit NSFW and for kids.)

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Old 12-25-2018, 06:21 AM
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Santa was here, at my home, this morning. Brought me the best gift ever.









I woke up.



Enjoy another day, folks.
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Old 12-25-2018, 06:58 AM
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Originally Posted by NJTman View Post
Santa was here, at my home, this morning. Brought me the best gift ever.
I woke up. Enjoy another day, folks.
Well stated. Amazing how we can pass day after day and forget any one of them could be our last one.
This time of the year makes me think back and consider how good God is to me and my family. Do I
really take note of it and give thanks? Sometimes my answer is no - - just life - - pass it on by - - no
big deal. OH YES it is a big deal. I try and let that soak in a bit to my thick skull. ...

Hey, fresh coffee and ph00 on the counter. And, I brought my wife's special muffins - - she made a
couple extras trays just for the break room. You will love them.

Have a great day and give thanks to the reason for the season. Wow, we are so blest.

Bob
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Old 12-25-2018, 10:47 AM
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Mmmmmm wonderful muffins!

Merry Christmas! Everyone

Happy Birthday Jesus!
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Old 12-25-2018, 11:05 AM
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Christmas day chillin at -5.
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Old 12-25-2018, 01:11 PM
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MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM A LONG TIME STALKER. These breakrooms have kept me in stitches and had me in tears. Hopefully they will go on for a long time. MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILIES. Mike
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