Geico266

My son in law has had a few "episodes" of over drinking that has my daughter concerned. I confronted him about it last night and he "came clean" telling me he is drinking vodka & mountain dew everyday. He has also been drinking and riding his motorcycle. Most of the time he just drinks it out of the bottle and follows it up with the dew. He has now admitted he has a problem (after he told my daughter he would stop 2 weeks ago and he didn't) and wants to join AA. He called and found out where and when the meetings are and he says he's going.

For you young guys out there, please make sure you are in control of your drinking. If you drink everyday you have a problem. If you drink on a "school" night you might have a problem. If you drink just to get drunk you have a problem. If you drink & drive you have a problem. If you drink more than twice a week you might have a problem. If you close down the bars every weekend you have a problem.

Moderation is the key to life.

Nothing good happens past midnight.

If you think you are really cool when you are drinking go to a bar stone sober at midnight. Why is it all the drunks are so stupid?

Any other advice? PM me if you don't want to post publicly.

fozzy777

God grant me the serinity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
Amen.
If you want to hurt yourself thats one thing, If you put other people in danger because of your actions, thats another. Good advice Gieco.

derek840378

i am pretty fond of alcohol but it was never a problem for me. im glad your son-in-law is getting help. a good buddy of mine was killed by a drunk-driver 3 days before i graduated, only 3 people from my class got to go to the funeral because it was the day of graduation. i myself am 6 months sober and now get my jollies from dtr

Andy505

I dont get drunk....its against my religion.
I dont drink alcohol....I dont see the point.

wannadiesel

I'm OK but my truck seems to have a bit of an alcohol problem.

P.J

It's a daily thing. (not going to use the cliche` term).

I have delt with substance abuse on and off for about 13 years now. A family member of mine had been doing pretty well for many years and just about threw her life away this past summer. In a matter of less than three month she spent thousands of (yeah, it was a mess) dollars of money I had saved for my income taxes, isolated herself from her child and risked losing a career she is very proud of.... it's gets worse, I'll spare you. She's got about 70 days sober at this point, but getting here has felt like hell on earth at times.

I can tell you from experience, there is NEVER enough out there of whatever drink or drug out there you are messing with. I could sit in a room full of kilos of my drug of choice and it will never make me happy.

It's a matter of what you have to loose and how much destruction you have already caused to yourself and the people that care about you.
Having my son see me in the condition that I have been in at certian points of my life? Just not worth it to me anymore. Being a disapointment to my Mom and co-workers because I didn't have a clear enough head to deal with clients? Not worth it.
The tens of thousands thrown away so I could feel like a total loser the next two days, then do it all over again 5 days later? Not worth it.

Anyone who is struggling with substance abuse NEEDS to understand that it will never, ever just get better without you Making it better.

Gieco, it's not what anyone want to hear, but if He's not ready to make the change in his life your daughter may be in for a rough ride.
It could all work out, but history tells me people prefer to fall on thier face than listen to people who love them and see that they are heading for trouble.

derek840378

if you drink alone, you have a problem

Scotty

An alcoholic has a conscience and a drunk does not.

I was a drunk for quite some time and then I got my conscience and it ruined my drinking. I tried to drink more, change friends, change cities, change me to no avail.

Theres a line in AA that goes like this...

Half measures availed us nothing.

When I was still on the fence about my drinking or when I would see someone on a 12 step call...that was not ready or wanting to get sober for any other reason except for themselves...I would change that line to read like this...

Half measures availed us nothing but three quarters and I might squeak by.

The result is nil until we let go ABSOLUTELY.

This time of year was toughest on me. After 21 yrs and change I am ok with the Holidays.

Sometimes meetings are not going to get the person on track.
Outside help is often needed.
All the family members better buck up and learn as much as possible about the disease of alcoholism. Never draw a conclusion from preconceived notions of what an alcoholic is or how its caused or what can be done until you have the tools to deal with it.
False pride can drag it out or keep us blind to the heart of the matter.
Its time for Tough Love.

Its amazing how many lives an alcoholic can touch...the circle is bigger then one can imagine.
Sometimes 2-5-10-15 and even 20 years later I heard of how I affected someone or am reminded of what it does. Its all reinforcement for me to be staying sober.

A good old friend of mine once told me this line at a meeting...

Scotty, while we are in here at this meeting, alcoholism is outside doing push ups, waiting for us.

Point well taken.

I also hated all the cliches and slogans at first. It took something like Osmosis for it to sink in for me.

I had big issues with the word GOD...as I did not understand it as I was forced to go to Church. I look at GOD as good orderly direction now.

Scotty

Chrisreyn

I was once told the definition of a drinking problem is that if your drinking causes ANY difficulties in your life of ANY sort, you have a problem...
This was in the alcohol safety class the judge made me attend when at age 18, I left a bar in Key West called The Fleet, to drive the mere 1/4 mile back to the base... I made it back, but rather than use the gate, I left the road, clearing a 10 foot concrete storm ditch, went through the base perimeter fence, through three trees, rolled a dumpster over my car, went across a street into the base housing area, and slammed into the side of a house, burying my Dodge Challenger into it up to the rear doors....
Missed a kid by less than a foot. ......
My BAC was almost .190.....close to being medicaly toxic.
At the time I felt drinking made me" a man"......
If any of you younger folk think that way, I got news for ya, it dont! It makes you irresponsible and that is all, and that is not what being a man is about.
Now, at age 40'ish.. I still have to explain that incident at job interveiws and almost lost a job because of issues with a security clearance from that one incident.
IT AINT WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not to mention the loss of your life, or having to live with having taken or ruined someone elses...........
My daughter had a freind named Jennifer, a real beauty, smart, the kinda girl you hope your son will find.
SHE DIDNT DRINK, didnt like it..but hug out with freinds who did.
Two years ago, at 19 years of age, Jennifer was killed when the car she was riding in went off the road and rolled, throwing Jennifer from the car into a tree at about 50mph.
The driver walked away with NO injuries.
It happened on a dry paved level road, 30 mph speed zone, and during daylight.
The drivers BAC was .05! She not only killed Jennifer, but ruined teh lives of Jennifers parents, her parents, and affected everyone she knew or that knew Jennifer.
She committed suicide last year..........this is a very true story, if ya need proof, PM me for the names, ect.

Everything you do in life makes ripples in the pond.........some good , some bad, but they can never be recalled.. END:

derek840378

everytime i drank i did just enough to get a buzz as a social thing w/ a couple of friends. the only time i got smashed was at my cousin's cousin's house but i knew i could stay the night. anyways after about 8 hours of drinking bud lights, smirnoffs, miller lights, you know the rhyme "liquor before beer, your in the clear. beer before liquor, never been sicker". i got it backwards, cause then came all the shots and cherries dipped in everclear. man i wish i hadnt done that. i was throwing up for about 4 hours the next day. i had to constantly drink water to have something to throw back up. for about 6 months after that even the thought of alcohol made me sick! but i never EVER drove after i had been drinking.

t-15 firefighter

Good advice. Though I can't agree with all of the observations (I drink 2 beers everyday that I'm off), I do agree with moderation. There is no doubt that I love beer. Always have (or at least since I was 16). I don't allow anything that I do to interfere with my family though. That, to me, is the most important thing in life.

The same could be said of people that smoke, over eat, or any number of things that is detrimental to our bodies. Moderation is the key to everything.


Come on now... Nothing?????

Britt

Geico266

Nothing good.

t-15 firefighter

Come on... My daughter was conceived after midnight. That was pretty good (and fun).

Britt

Geico266

Not for HER (your wife's) father!
and we are talking about drinking and how to avoid problems, not your love life!

Nothing good happens past midnight.